George Carlin

If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.

I think I am, therefore I am. I think.

I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood.

Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that.

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

I think people should be allowed to do anything they want. We haven't tried that for a while. Maybe this time it'll work.

Remember, wolves mate for life, and they care for their sick and infirm; they don't run them off, or kill them, or abandon them. Give me a wolf over some fuckin' jackoff rancher any day of the week.