Gordon Korman

Ask yourself: 'Do I feel the need to laminate?' Then teaching is for you.

I hate France. It's like the whole country's on a diet.

Don't think of it as losing a boyfriend. Think of it as gaining a stalker.

The dog always dies. Go to the library and pick out a book with an award sticker and a dog on the cover. Trust me, that dog is going down.

For someone who's smarter than a supercomputer, sometimes you're a real idiot.

No fair! Those guys ripped off what we rightfully stole!

In our family, you don't get a childhood. We're too busy trying to dominate the world.